Can you briefly explain how you organize the sides/teams within your club?
We have a “women’s+” side and a “men’s+” side. We use those terms more often when we refer to our competitive divisions, since those are more explicitly gendered, but make it clear that people can play on the side where they feel safest, most comfortable, and/or that most aligns with their identity, regardless of gender identity/sex. Typically we just refer to them as:
Our women’s+ side is called “Ferals”
Our men’s+ side is called “Filthy”
Our developmental/friendly side is called “Fierce”
How long have the Flamingos been structured in this way?
The Ferals began in 2023, but the Flamingos have always welcomed all identities to play for whatever existing side(s) we have. When we only had a “Men’s+” side, we still had cis and trans women playing with us competitively, as well as other trans/non-binary identities. Trans men have always had a significant presence on the team and today we intentionally recruit trans people across the gender spectrum to join.
What has it meant for players on the Flamingos to be able to play under this model?
It means getting a break from fighting your way into spaces or feeling like you need to justify your place on a team. You can go where you’re comfortable and expect to be celebrated, not questioned.
What has the reception from opposing teams been like when playing against the Flamingos?
Within IGR, we receive nothing but praise, support, and community. Outside of IGR…. You know what? We pretty much still receive nothing but praise, support and community. It’s been incredibly moving to have every single club in our competitive womens+ matrix make a commitment to support and include trans women in the game. We can make sure OUR team is safe for trans players all day, but if your opponents don’t have your backs, things can still feel really exhausting, disappointing and scary. I’m so happy that our players do not need to hide their identities to play competitively and I am grateful for the local community of solidarity we have here. Our men’s+ matrix, apart from a few isolated incidents, tend to also welcome us with open arms. They offered advice and support when our team was new and learning the game, reach out for friendlies regularly, and have never questioned the eligibility of any of our players.
Personally, how did you find rugby? What made you want to start playing?
As a young trans person, I honestly just thought rugby would make me feel extra masculine during a time where I struggled with my perceived androgyny. At the time, I still had to join the high school girl’s team and had this image of rugby as this queer haven full of the most butch people imaginable. To my surprise, my team was mostly comprised of straight, christian, country girls. And ya know what? It was still awesome. They were lovely people, gave me the community and friendship I needed so badly at that time, and supported me when I came out to them and through a lot more of life’s struggles. In my life, rugby has always been the bar for the least judgmental and most inclusive community, even with demographics where I wouldn’t expect it.
How did you find the Flamingos? What made you want to join?
At my first pride parade at 15 years old, I saw the DC Renegades gay men’s rugby team marching in the parade and knew that I would join a gay team the moment I could. The Flamingos were conveniently founded the summer I moved back from college, and I was able to be a founding member of the team. I was excited to be a part of a new team so I could play a bigger part in shaping the team and teaching a new sport to people. I was the first captain of the Flamingos and have held a leadership role ever since.
How has being part of the Flamingos / rugby at large impacted your life? Has it changed who you are, the way you see / think about yourself, your access to community, etc.?
It really did change my life. I spend a lot of my time trying to give back as much as I got and get out of rugby. I know how much of a difference it can make for someone struggling to find their people, and at risk of seeming very cultish, I want to bring this sport to as many people as possible.
Support club rugby! You can find the Baltimore Flamingos on Instagram @baltimoreflamingos and Val @youfrontin. If you want to watch a match or are in the Baltimore area and interested in joining, the Flamingos' season schedule and more information can be found at the former. The Flamingos welcome players of all identities and backgrounds!
